Info for agents and publishers

Vic Reeves stole my hat(s).

I like hats – especially top hats. I also have a large skull so getting hats in my size is hard. There is a shop in Canterbury that sells top hates (Revivals). It took several visits before I could get myself a top hat because each time I visited, Vic Reeves had been there first and brought all the top hats in our size.

Random girls stole my hat

I went out on my own one Friday afternoon. Got given free beer at a bar because the barmaid was annoyed that the owner had not come back even though her shift was over.

Said barmaid and I went to another pub, met some mutual friends, and then went to a few clubs. At Totally Wired many attractive ladies tried my hat on (the black leather one).

I joked that my hat was more popular than me. So I made a Facebook page for the hat.

I was an about.com expert presenter

Back in the day, there was a website called about.com where you could find articles and videos about stuff. I worked with a filmmaker to produce a series of presentations on the C++ programming language.

The editor for the C++ section emailed me thanking me for a high-quality contribution. He subscribed to my blog which he also liked.

Something I have kept secret is that I learned the information needed to present the video about ten minutes before we shot it. It helped that I was a professional programmer in a different coding language and most such domain knowledge is transferable.

Professor Elemental stole my top hat in Brighton

Professor Elemental stole my hat during the part of the performance where he freestyle-rapped about things the audience gave him. (He gave it back later).

I got to hang out with Professor Elemental and Mr B the Gentleman Rhymer after the show. I was in an ungodly amount of pain that day but it was totally worth it.

Got myself in the local paper and it was not hat related

There is a junction near my home. Every few years there is a nasty accident there because you cannot see on-coming traffic from the right.

My mother, two sisters and unborn niece were almost lost to that junction.

I started a petition to have a mirror placed opposite so that drivers could see to the right. Kent County Council said no on the grounds of health and safety.

The local paper ran an article about my campaign.

I once tried to make a famous Christian band leave the venue they were to perform in.

I was a steward for the Christian convention Spring Harvest. My team ran the venue where Phatfish would be playing. Not recognising the band members, I asked them to leave as the venue was not open.

They had to convince me they were the band. Whoops.

Footnotes: Social media successes

• 
  On Mastodon, notifications cap out at 40+ hiding the fact that it may take an hour to read them all

Other…

I’m not sure what I will put here yet.