I have recently realised that I have been suffering from a massive bout of imposter syndrome. So massive that I had failed to even notice it.
Imposter syndrome is something that I have written about for Thanet Creative. It had always been a nagging doubt that I generally managed to ignore. Not any more, apparently.
Realising that imposter syndrome had me in its grip
Recently, I was going through older posts for Author Buzz that I had written. They were mostly long-form articles about marketing, blogs, and social media from a writer’s and author’s perspective. I found myself thinking, some of these are pretty good – why don’t I write posts like this any more?
That thought gave me significant pause. I’ve not been writing posts like that because I feel that I do not have anything worthwhile to say. Why not? Why do I suddenly have nothing to offer?
It is because I have become convinced that I am a fraud. Who am I to be giving blogging advice, marketing tips, or social media pointers? I’m a nobody.
That is when I thought, “oh, my goodness – this is imposter syndrome, isn’t it”. That explains a few things.
Imposter syndrome – somewhat ironically – mostly affects people who have learned enough about something to become aware of how much more they have yet to learn. It is successful people who have earned their success through skill that feel it most keenly.
Imposter syndrome’s insidious subversion
Did my imposter syndrome mean that I did have valuable skills and insights? Was I just kidding myself that I had anything worthwhile to say? Now, I was not sure at all.
It has become such a strong sense of self-doubt that I cannot write posts about writing (for Thanet Creative), posts about local politics and events (for Thanet Star), posts about author platforms (for Author Buzz), or even posts with my own stories here on my own blog.
In short, I’ve not been writing these posts because I do not feel good enough to write them. That feeling of not being good enough is the heart of imposter syndrome. This malady of many writers had got me good and tight in its grip. It was only when I had to review the evidence that, actually I can write well on these subjects, that I even noticed.
Fighting back against imposter syndrome
The only way forward, I reasoned, was to just do the writing despite my fear that I do not know enough to be useful. I will let you know if that turns out to be enough to wriggle free from imposter syndrome.
Have you ever suffered from feeling like a fraud? Like everyone else can see that what you produce isn’t really all that good? If you have, I would love to hear how you dealt with those feelings. Please use the comments below to share your thoughts.
